Doctor, Doctor, Give Me The News

They forgot to call me when Jenny and Chris met with Dr. P.  Oops. I predicted Picozzi would offer up more chemotherapy.  He didn't disappoint. She starts her chemo pills tonight. She will do it for two more weeks, and then try and get on a trial at SCCC.

Jenny's numbers came back showing some improvement. This doesn't mean she is being cured, but that this chemo (which I have never thought wise) has had some modest effect. I wish I had been in the meeting, because my question would have been, if you think this is working, why switch to a trial? 

The confusion and hallucinations, what about those? Dr  P. thinks it isn't her liver. But, we are to document all strange behaviors, digestive problems, low BP etc for the foreseeable future. His suggestion? Cut back on her Xanax by 1/2. Go from 1 to half a Xanax. She already, on her own, stopped the fentanyl. She had used it for a short time, so whatever. She has been taking Xanax since the beginning of treatment. 1 pill a night. If she doesn't have it, she can't sleep. But more than that, I am betting half a Xanax isn't pushing her over the edge. Today, after she got home, she said a lot of wild things to me. All were apropos to nothing:

"The guy who left a note downstairs stole my coat." 

"Somehow you have a brown rice model on your roof."

"Cremation. There have to be some places that cremate you better than others."

"I didn't know ghosts could trip and fall."

My heart is breaking for her.  There were more. I only included those I captured at the time. Mind you, it has been 2 days since she was off the reduced fentanyl patch, and no new meds are on board, so it is questionable to me that is us caused by the drugs.. Dr. P did concede, apparently, that her liver may not be able to filter out as much as before, so the meds are having a greater impact. I am no doctor, so I will, for now, defer to him.

Both Dr. B and Dr . P were present at the exam. Jenny asked if she could drive. They had her close her eyes, stick her arms out to her sides and try to stand. She did this and almost instantly fell. Dr. B caught her. They both said she can't drive.  Finally.

I am worried, so worried,  for myriad reasons. She is hardly able to walk. She can't safely climb stairs alone, has to go down stairs on her butt. She vomits daily or almost every day. She has shortness of breath after walking a few feet, has terrible balance, is incredibly weak, is tired all the time. She is talking out of her head. Her blood pressure looks more like latitude and longitude of Botswana. She has so many mets on her liver the radiologist calls the number innumerable. She has been bleeding internally. The list goes on. And on.

In other news. . . Jenny went out to dinner with a friend, ate solid food, and was back home for two minutes before it was all for naught. My tolerance for vomit? Zero Kelvin.