kvetching up

“ There is not so helpless and pitiable an object in the world as a landsman beginning a sailor's life . ” --Richard Henry Dana Jr. from Two Years Before the Mast The new chemotherapy regimen has shown a modicum of success.  Here is the latest chart, showing the CA 19-9 cancer antigen measurement, including the most recent from last week, while I was away: This is good news, one hopes, in terms of extending Jenny's life. A drop of 5000 in two weeks has to be good.  At the same time, she is dropping weight.  She is now maintaining around 157-160 lbs. , but that is low.  And her caloric intake, just to maintain this weight is massive.  In other good news, Jenny has finally found a cannabis delivery system that is working--smoking joints. And, it has massively improved her ability to eat--with this chemo generally and significantly killing her appetite. The doctor measured Jenny's CEA (another cancer antigen marker) again last week. Last time, on Aug 12, I was led...

Entry 1    Going Nowhere, Going Nowhere I've been awake much of the.night, and gave up trying to sleep around 6 a.m.  I am sharing a bed with Jenny for the first time in a year out of necessity and a misunderstanding that when the place said it sleeps 5, that I would have my own sleeping space.  The good news is, the bed we are sleeping on, a pull-out couch, is so uncomfortable it is not possible to sleep soundly.  That last fact came in handy last night when I was having an M. Night Shyalamanesque nightmare , after spending the afternoon telling my kids what a terrible filmmaker he is. I dreamt I was at a multiplex to see a movie, not "Old" (his latest), but some movie created by my psyche. Jenny and I got into a row at the theater over the baseball hat she was wearing ( Eric's el pinché's. The real one somehow disappeared in the move. . . weird) and I stormed off. I ended up in a theater playing the faux-Shyamalan movie. The storyline was about going to ...

Entry 1 Dreams of living near the water must be met another day for Jenny.  We got beat by 15k.  It was a beautiful home near Be'er Sheva Park , but I have perverse satisfaction (mixed with ample doses of disappointment), after what I disclosed in my last entry.