kvetching up

Let 'er roll! Yesterday I got mixed signals from Monjouro. I had hunger and ate lunch. Immediately after and until today, I paid for it by feeling overfull, lethargic for the rest of the day and evening. I didn't eat a lot, just a sandwich but it felt like I had showed up at The Royal Fork and had gone through the buffet line 16 times  I was so full, I couldn't even get myself to drink fluids. Wild.  The girls are calling every day, sounding sweet, but full of worry. I planned with Abby that she call me each day--she is 3000 miles away and worried, hence the calls  But sweet Leiney has called each day too, worried, inquisitive, and hopeful. These kids are my rock. Luck Be A Lady I feel like I have treated my body like I am a drunk and my body a flophouse. I have made, knowingly and with intentional ignorance masquerading as bravado as I poisoned my body over and again. Now that I live like a monk--albeit one who last year started smoking pot routinely again after 40 ...

 Entry 1.    4:20 9:20 p.m. Jenny's new  marijuana guru sent a preliminary shipment of tincture and bud for her to use to treat her cancer, while he creates her magic oils.  I smoked so much pot as a kid, people could easily have mistaken me as the lovechild of Cheech & Chong . I knew growers and dealers in my neighborhood, and their and saw operations that would have blow your mind in the 1980s. I quit smoking when I was 20. I tried it again, off and on after I was 45, but it doesn't work for me. Jenny was not a pot smoker, maybe tried it a few times, like 3-4, well after she was in her 20s. She has tried to use different forms of it to treat her cancer, encourages by healthcare professionals including her palliative doc.  I have a friend who runs a network of pot shops in California, and she hooked me up with a Ph.D botanist in 2020, and he gave me lots of advice, all of it good. We tried to follow it. Smoking the flower was the best, he said. But J...