Teach Your Children Well, Their Father's Hell Did Slowly Go By

De Nile flowing through Egypt
Leiney is an amazing young woman.  Her kindness is innate, and overflows all the time. She is whipsmart, curious, and obsessed with justice.  It's what drew her to Fairhaven, where she has just completed her first two quarters.  She entered uni with 60 credits, so she is technically a sophomore.  But she has been stuck home, doing distance learning since last spring as a high school senior and is done with it.  Yesterday, she told Jenny and I that she has withdrawn for spring quarter and is going to find work.  I felt sorrow for her, and was quiet--trying to keep my shit separate from hers--after she told us.  Jenny, gushed with pride.  She told Leiney she was so proud of her for telling us, and for being proactive about withdrawing--sentiments I share.  Jenny then said, its just so hard with so much going on, COVID-19 and your mom sick with a terminal illness.  I waited.  The third leg of the stool which our family lives under never showed.

I am not raising the issue with Jenny.  After the discussion, Jenny left.  I had a talk with Leiney soon thereafter where we acknowledged that COVID-19 and the cancer are hell, but there is something else we are all struggling with and causing great stress for the three of us not involved in the affair.

Meanwhile, Abby is performing tonight in The Complete Works of Shakespeare at YTN.  Of course Abby has multiple roles, knows all her lines, all the moves, all the marking.  She nails it every time. The kid drives to YTN and back with a parent. Given Jenny's illness, I usually am riding shotgun with Abby. But when Jenny is feeling well enough to go visit friends, to go hang out at school, to see Eric the pinché motherfucker, or to pick up friends from the airport, well, then I want her to share in the load.
Tonight, although she hasn't said it outright, she would like me to do the second leg of the drive.  

Jenny, unlike me, comes home from the island sometimes, on the nights she rides with Abby. This means it's twice as much travel, but you aren't stuck on the island sitting in a car.  Despite my vertigo, I worked all day while she was out and made dinner this evening.  I'm not volunteering.  She is clearly annoyed that I haven't offered.  She just told me her back hurts and she can't take her pain meds because she has to drive.  I'm glad she has decided to embrace that rule,  simply not using oxycontin and driving, which she has refused to follow until now. Instead, when I have raised the matter in the past, at best I get her scoffing at me for expressing concern about being impaired while driving. However she comes round to not driving on oxy, it is all for the good.  



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