kvetching up

Two years. She has copped to it. The story doesn't matter. She says two years. Her fuzzy memory finding great clarity. Then, with even greater specificity. July 28, 2018. It doesn't fit her narrative that this all started because we were so miserable.  We had, as she pointed out when she decided to give me a precise date,  just gotten back from a lovely trip across Europe.  It was so lovely.  I don't remember even bickering. We had, what i thought was a blissful vacation.  All of it. So, I am certain she is still lying about the date-especially given the proof I have found that this stretches back to at least the beginning of 2018.  Leiney found out on Saturday morning around 10:45.  Sitting next to Jenny on the couch as Jenny scrolled through texts, Leiney saw conversations Jenny and I were having about the affair. Jenny didn't think to hide it from Leiney. Leiney told Jenny she'd seen the texts, apparently. Chemo brain or she just doesn't give a fuc...

Eric   Is a Pinché Motherfucker   I have receipts. For hotel, motel, and casino trysts going back to July 19. Possibly as early as 2018. But definitely July, when she stayed with Eric at a casino in Kingston. I have undeniable proof she went to Vegas with him in November 2019. More on that in a bit. I'm concerned that she has been spending our money on hotel after hotel, flights and whatever else.  I have told her today I need access to all the accounts, that it is non-negotiable.  She is stonewalling.  But when she feels better, I will get the information.   The systematic excavation of her phone continued last night.  I found Erics  the pinche motherfucker's flight itinerary for Vegas from November 2019.  I told my therapist today. She didn't think there was much point in confronting Jenny about it, she predicted she would lie.   Later in the day today, after a day of debilitating nausea, she rallied and Jennifer Murray ...

Jenny apparently thinks I have treated Sheila and Jennifer Murray poorly.  At least that is what she said to Sheila. Sheila doesn't give a shit, and concurs with Jenny.  This is unbelievable. Jenny said she was surprised that I care so much.  What the hell? I feel every visit to Jennifer Murray's, every text to Sheila or Jennifer or Eric   the pinche motherfucker is a betrayal. Today I saw his portrait on an electrical box.  I have a fantasy of creating a bumper sticker that says this man is cheating on his wife and putting it on the box, on the front bumper of his car. I hate that she is still seeing him and will not stop.  Its so painful. I hate that she is sick, dying in fact, and want her to be happy.  But how do I live with this?  I love her.  I want to care for her, and want her to care for me. She only complains about me. I saw a text complaining that I said I was going to, on occasion, be in the living room to work. I have a roll...

Jenny has cancer.  Terminal cancer.  We learned that in late July. Jenny had  dropped 25 lbs. in the spring without trying.  She had been having vague stomach complaints since October.  As a balm for her concerns, her doctor agreed to do a CT scan for her, but told her they would find nothing.  Jenny wanted to rule out pancreatic cancer, which had recently killed her dad-in the spring of 2019.  Her mother had been sick with lymphoma since February 2020.  The day of the scan, the doctor told Jenny they would get results back in a few days. When Jenny's phone rang that same afternoon, I was in the living room with Abby, where I was torturing her by playing the Rapping Duke on Youtube. Jenny shouted from the room, "Geoff, get in here, the doctor's on the phone." "You have a four cm. mass on your pancreas,"  he said. Jenny made a sound like someone had punched her in the stomach.  "There is a spot on your liver. You have a necrotic lymph nod...